We are all broken. Broken in ways we will never be the same. Our lives become obstacles of walls we place to maze those through in means to protect ourselves. I am more guilty of this than most. The irony? Wanting a fairy-tale ending and yet being scared to take the risk.
I have had my walls begin to fall. There is one that has spoken to my very core in such a way that I can not drown out the sound of his voice. I find myself in my maze of walls and dark forests….following a sound that I can’t get out of my mind. Each turn I face the obstacles I have place to protect me, the thoughts that have controlled me. I am testing my armor. With each turn, I battle the thoughts that kept me confined and isolated. I have never wanted anything so much in my life….to be free from the fortress that I have spent endless hours for years building. Unlike most fairy-tales, where the knight saves the princess…..I am fighting. I am fighting for myself…I am fighting for him.
The weight of my chains make movement so incredibly difficult, but not impossible. I am learning how to fight…in a war I have never battled. Monsters surface, endurance tested, will proved. I am fighting because my heart has found it’s meaning, it’s love.
Broken crayons still color life’s canvas. I am broken, I am guarded, but I am fighting. I am fighting my demons to get to him. I am fighting for my fairy tale. He in all his broken crayons paint my life’s canvas with such beauty. His beautiful brokenness is my sunrise. Even his darkest colors are so incredibly beautiful, so real, you can feel it. It’s a midnight sky in the winter. Cold and crisp, where it stings your nose, a cold you can feel move through you, but makes you feel as if you’re alive. I will take his winter midnight’s over a sunny beach day. The stars are endless, wishes countless, and silence around us. It’s he and I in a world in which we can create. Our colors compliment, and for the first time in so long, I see more than the rainbow, I see a spectrum of life.